Insights & Resources

Join our clinicians as they share their insights on mental wellness strategies, research, and current events

Anxiety Depression Mental Wellness PMAD Stress By Beth Church 0 Comments

Recognizing Perinatal Mood or Anxiety Disorders

Written by: Jessi Beatty, PhD, LP

There are so many pressures that come with being a new parent. It often feels like there’s an expectation for things to ‘come naturally’ and be filled with overwhelming joy and love. The reality of bringing a new life into the world is filled with tectonic physical changes and intense emotions of all kinds. This can make it difficult to talk about maternal mental health, as most moms feel the pressures of stigma surrounding their less-than-perfect experience. During May, which is Maternal Mental Health Awareness Month, we want to establish a new normal; one  in which all parents can openly acknowledge both amazing and challenging aspects of parenthood, and advocate for individuals who experience perinatal mood or anxiety disorders. 

Pressures of Parenthood

The transition to parenthood is challenging in one way or another for almost everyone. So many changes happen during this time: sleep, relationships, work, schedules, and other areas of life can have significant shifts. It can be hard to know what a ‘normal adjustment’ is when you are feeling tired and overwhelmed as you adapt to these big changes. Feelings of shame or embarrassment can come up if the transition feels harder than you expected or if you’re not feeling the “glow” of new parenthood that is often romanticized in our society. However, it is normal to feel this way, and you are not alone in this.

We tend to be hard on ourselves and put the blame on a lack of something inside us rather than realizing the struggles could be an indication of a medical condition and not a sign of failure. Additionally, each person’s experience of parenthood is unique. For some, bonds and adjustment come fairly easily, while for others, it may be more difficult. Neither of these experiences are the “right” one.

The intensity of these changes and the onslaught of emotion and pressure can make it difficult to recognize when a perinatal mood or anxiety disorder (PMAD) is present, so it is important to know the signs and symptoms, and the differences from normal ‘baby blues.’

Baby blues vs perinatal mood or anxiety disorder (PMAD)

Research shows up to 80% of new parents experience some mood swings and weepiness during the first 2-3 weeks of parenthood. This is often labeled “the baby blues” and will resolve without any medical assistance.

Up to 20% of women can continue to struggle past this period and experience more significant symptoms of depression during their pregnancy or postpartum period. About 6% of pregnant women and about 10% of postpartum women have anxiety, intrusive repetitive thoughts, panic, or post-traumatic stress. Sometimes women experience anxiety alone, but others can experience both anxiety and depression during this period. Postpartum Psychosis, where the mother’s thoughts are significantly altered  and often scary,  occurs in approximately 1 to 2 out of every 1,000 deliveries. The media often calls postpartum psychosis depression, but it is a separate and unique illness. Any of these reactions can also occur with miscarriage, abortion, stillbirth, or infant loss.

When someone starts to feel sad, worried, or not interested in activities that used to bring them joy, and experience several other symptoms (discussed next) they may be experiencing PMAD. You may feel more irritable, agitated, or overwhelmed rather than sad or nervous. Other symptoms might include insomnia or sleeping most of the time, appetite changes, restlessness, feelings of hopelessness or worthlessness, difficulty concentrating, and physical symptoms such as dizziness, rapid heartbeat, or aches and pains that last beyond typical recovery from birth. 

Risk factors for PMAD include a personal or family history of anxiety or depression, previous depression or anxiety, or thyroid imbalance. When symptoms move to this level of intensity seeking outside support is important and there are many research backed treatments that work very well. 

Comparison of Baby Blues vs. PMAD

  Baby Blues PMAD
When it starts After birth (can start while at the hospital) During pregnancy or up to one year postpartum
How long it lasts A few days, up to three weeks Longer than three weeks
Typical symptoms Mood is generally happy or calm with bouts of moodiness, tearfulness, anxiety and/or sadness

 

Trouble concentrating

 Mood predominantly sad, anxious, or irritable with some of the following symptoms: scary thoughts, hopelessness, feelings of guilt, problems sleeping, fatigue, loss of interest in activities typically enjoyed, changes in appetite, trouble making decisions or trouble concentrating

 

When to seek help

Consider reaching out for help if your emotions make it difficult to:

  •       Parent effectively
  •       Take care of yourself effectively (including getting enough sleep or eating well)
  •       Perform daily tasks or complete work tasks

Other important signs you should reach out for help:

  •       Thinking about hurting yourself or your child
  •       Feeling like you are often reexperiencing a traumatic birth experience, pregnancy  loss or other past traumatic event
  •       Frequent bouts of crying
  •       Feeling hopeless or worthless
  •       Experiencing persistent scary thoughts such as your baby being harmed or you harming your baby
  •       Worrying that you are “losing your mind” or “going crazy”
  •       Feeling like you have not been able to bond with your child and/or you are not fit to be a parent

Conclusion

Perinatal mood or anxiety disorders are temporary and treatable with professional help for both moms and dads. The transition to parenthood is tough on us all but if it reaches a level described above it’s important to reach out for help. Treatment typically includes some combination of increased and targeted self-care, social support, therapy, and/or treatment of symptoms with medication when necessary.

Self-care is aimed at increasing resilience during a time in which so much mental and physical burden is placed upon you. It includes proper rest, good nutrition, assistance with baby and other children, and caring for personal needs such as exercise, relaxation, or time with partner/spouse. Building up your support team for a wide range of supports is important during this time. Talking with a counselor or therapist who understands perinatal mental health disorders can be extremely beneficial. There are several research backed treatments that can help you improve your mood, cope more effectively during the transition to parenthood, and develop the relationship with your child(ren) and partner that you want.

Resources:

Postpartum Support International: https://www.postpartum.net/

World Maternal Mental Health Day – May 7, 2025: https://wmmhday.postpartum.net/

Pine Rest Mother and Baby Day Program: https://www.pinerest.org/day-programs/mother-baby-program/

Pine Rest Resource: Understanding PMAD: https://www.pinerest.org/media/Understanding-PMAD.pdf

University of Michigan Women and Infants Mental Health Program: https://medicine.umich.edu/dept/psychiatry/programs/women-infants-mental-health 

Zero to Thrive Clinic: https://zerotothrive.org/clinical-services/perinatal-psychiatry-clinic/

Book recommendation: Mom Brain, Ilyse Dobrow DiMarco, PhD: https://www.amazon.com/Mom-Brain-Strategies-Overwhelming-Motherhood/dp/1462540260

Resources in the Community

Nature’s Playhouse: https://www.naturesplayhouse.com/

Honey for Moms: https://www.honeyformoms.com/

Scarff JR. Postpartum Depression in Men. Innovations in Clinical Neuroscience. 2019 May 1;16(5-6):11-14. PMID: 31440396; PMCID: PMC6659987.

Kim P, Swain JE. Sad dads: paternal postpartum depression. Psychiatry (Edgmont). 2007 Feb;4(2):35-47. PMID: 20805898; PMCID: PMC2922346.

Autism Mental Wellness Uncategorized By Beth Church 0 Comments

Transitions on the Spectrum

 

Written by Jessica Hauser-Harrington, PhD, LP

Spring is a time of transitions and new beginnings. For high school seniors, it brings the end of their secondary education, and often, the transition to college or jobs. For seniors on the Autism Spectrum, it can be a time of both excitement and celebration, as well as one of potential anxiety and uncertainty. Fortunately, with planning and preparation, worries can be reduced and celebrations enjoyed more thoroughly.

Marking the Transition

These transitions are typically marked with milestone celebrations such as graduation ceremonies and parties. For an individual with ASD, large crowds, loud noises, and the need to sit still in one place for extended periods of time can be challenging. Pre-planning strategies to manage sensory overload, anxiety, and fatigue during these milestone celebrations is key. Can they wear ear buds or noise dampening/canceling headphones? If there will be long stretches of time between meals, is there a way to pack a snack? Is there a comfort object or fidget that might help the sitting and waiting feel less stressful? Is it possible to sit near an aisle where getting up and taking a break would be more feasible? Will your son or daughter want to take pictures before the ceremony, after, or on a different day?

When it comes to graduation parties, don’t assume that your child will or won’t want a party. Discuss expectations for the number of guests, the foods served, and how social you want your child to be at the part. This is their first time around celebrating this milestone, and discussing expectations will leave more room for joy.  It may also be useful to pre-plan breaks or “calm down” areas if the party extends over what is a typical interval of interaction time for your child. Would a different type of celebration altogether be more enjoyable–be willing to think outside the box. Finally, make sure to discuss expectations with siblings and extended family members who may also be joining in celebrating your senior.

Transitioning to College

If your son or daughter is transitioning to college, planning ahead is also important. Some teenagers think they will automatically acquire a certain level of responsibility, initiative or skill just by becoming a “college student.” Unfortunately, that’s not usually the case. Whether it’s six months ahead or six weeks ahead or maybe just 6 days ahead, have discussions about what life skills are needed to be successful at college above and beyond the academic demands and start practicing. If they don’t know how to already, teaching your child how to do laundry, how to cook some basic meals, how to manage basic finances (including setting up a bank account that a parent has access to as well), and how to navigate bus systems or public transportation (if applicable) will be important. Use a scaffolding technique, where you demonstrate basic skills, allow your child to replicate them with supervision, and then add on more complex or advanced skills as they progress. You may also consider creating social stories, checklists or algorithms around these new responsibilities that your child can take with them to college.

Many colleges and universities also have ASD-specific programs to help support your son or daughter both academically and socially. Making sure to look into these options and apply to them (if required) ahead of time. Similarly, if your child has an IEP or 504 plan, these can transition into college-level accommodations. Ensuring that your child’s testing is up to date is also a key part of this process as most colleges and universities will want recent testing data. Contacting the school’s office of student support services to learn what their requirements are and what the process is to get the accommodations set up is important and something that you may need to do with your child. If your son or daughter is 18 or older, make sure that they sign the necessary releases of information that will allow you to also communicate with university staff as needed.

If your child sees a therapist at home, consider options for telehealth (if in the same state or allowed by the therapist’s licensing/credentials) or seek out referrals in your child’s new city. Most, if not all, colleges and universities have counseling centers on campus that offer both individual therapy as well as group therapy options. The session number per student might be limited though, so identifying clinicians in the local community is also a great idea. Also, if your child takes regular medications, make plans to have a large enough supply, transfer the prescriptions to a pharmacy on or near campus, or look into mail-order delivery. If your son or daughter will be picking up their medications on their own for the first time, practice going to the pharmacy with them. 

Transitioning to a Job

If your son or daughter is transitioning to a job, utilize resources from your local school district. She or he may have options to take interest inventories that may help point him or her in the direction of a job or work environment they may be interested in. Public schools also have specific transition planning for students with IEPs. Job training resources through the school district or MichiganWorks can be an option to help build skills and identify potential jobs. Helping your son or daughter to be realistic about the number of hours he or she feels they can work, whether he or she wants a public-facing or behind the scenes job, and what level of supervision he or she will require is important. Discussions around managing finances, contributing at home financially and/or through chores will help clarify expectations for your adult child and the changing relationship you may have with them as they age. 

Additional Resources and Relevant Websites for Adolescents and Adults with ASD/CI/DD

Community Mental Health Oakland County https://www.oaklandchn.org/ 

Autism Alliance of Michigan (call to get resource information sometimes better than navigating their online system) https://autismallianceofmichigan.org/ 

Living and Learning Enrichment Center (www.livingandlearningcenter.org) 248-308-3592

OUCARES at Oakland University (http://www.oakland.edu/oucares/): for Adult social groups and employment skills 248-370-2424

On My Own: Independent living resources for adults (https://onmyownofmi.org/)

MORC: Services for individuals with physical and intellectual disabilities in Oakland County (https://www.morcinc.org/)

Community Living Services: https://www.comlivserv.com/ 

The ARC of Oakland County: Non-profit that focuses on advocacy and community participation for individuals with intellectual and developmental disabilities (https://thearcoakland.org/) 

Michigan Rehabilitation Services: https://www.michigan.gov/leo/bureaus-agencies/mrs

Possible places to find additional support:

Friendship Circle: https://www.friendshipcircle.org/

SAIL (group of parents in the area looking for living solutions for their adult children with special needs): https://sailhousingsolutions.org/

Family Therapy Parenting Relationships Stress By Beth Church 0 Comments

Forging Your New Family Portrait: How to Shield Kids’ Mental Health During Divorce

Written by Jessi Beatty PhD, LP
Edited by Julie Braciszewski, PhD, LP

The choice to separate or divorce from a partner is complex and incredibly difficult. However, separation or divorce can be the best decision for everyone involved, including the children. Research has shown that children who  are exposed to open, unresolved conflict between their parents regularly are more stressed than children from divorced families. Divorce can provide a model of adult behavior and relationships that emphasizes working out problems with compassion, wisdom, and appropriate action. Among the many decisions on reorganizing your lives, are choices about parenting. When divorce is the best option, there are specific ways parents can make the transition smoother and support their children’s mental health.

Forge a new picture of family 

Divorce can be an opportunity to consciously shape your family bonds in a way that feels positive and powerful. Spending a little time reflecting on what was and was not working in your former family configuration will go a long way in forging this path forward. How do you want your new family to relate to each other? What are each family member’s roles and how do they express these in the family system? What aspects of family are most important to you – time spent together, emotional support, humor, respect, independence? In what ways will you be sure these aspects flourish in your family moving forward? 

Stick to the routine as best as possible

Divorce or separation usually causes major disruptions to routines and schedules. Consciously striking  a balance between honoring old routines and establishing new ones can help ease the transitions and provide a sense of stability.  Maintain routine activities like eating dinner together, going on walks, bedtime routines or having weekend movie nights. Make a list of these routines and highlight the ones you are purposely going to stick to in this transition. This helps your family stay connected as well as help maintain typical expectations for behavior. For instance, maintaining your typical chore or homework schedule can help your child meet their responsibilities at home and at school, which in turn helps them feel stable and confident.  You can give a little more grace and patience, but if routines and schedules change drastically, it can be very confusing and make your children feel more out of control.

It’s important to spend time together as a family. This can be with or without the other parent, whichever works best for you and the new relationship you are creating with your former partner. Quality time is a great tool for helping kids feel safe, loved, secure in their relationship with you, and can help to establish a new sense of normal.  

Make sure they have a space that feels like their own

Children can be very concrete, which means they associate complex ideas or relationships with more simple or physical things or spaces. Their understanding of family relationships, stability and safety may be associated or linked with a physical location, like the former family home. Moving to a new home or visiting a parent in their new residence may have a larger, destabilizing emotional impact than expected, bringing sadness, anxiety or negative behaviors to the surface. You can increase your child’s sense of control and ‘ownership’ over this new space by letting them arrange furniture, pick out small items to decorate, and shift some belongings from their previous home into the new space.  

Limit conflict in front of the children

Keeping the lines of communication open between you and your ex-partner regarding the children is very important. Research has consistently shown children cope best when they are not exposed to adults’ ongoing conflicts. If there is high conflict between you and your ex, keep any conversations to basics like pickup and drop off times, doctor’s appointments, important school dates, or necessary information about your children.

Communication should be between the adults. Do not use your children to send messages back and forth between your ex-partner. Possible ways to exchange information include email, a book that goes back and forth with the children or one of the many co-parenting apps that are available. They can help maintain privacy by allowing you to remain in contact with your ex-partner without giving out phone numbers or email addresses, keep track of important dates in the schedule, share key information about the child(ren), and transfer money. Some are free and some charge a fee. In Oakland County, Family Wizard is often the recommended tool for communication between co-parents. 

Use neutral language to describe your ex

This can be one of the most challenging aspects of managing child-parent relationships during and after divorce. The pull to express to your child why and how you, or your child, were wronged can be intense. You may want to describe their other parent’s shortcomings, hurtful behaviors, or negative choices as a way to cope with your own feelings about the situation, or validate the child’s. And while helping to validate a child’s hurt feelings is important, ongoing or regular disparaging comments about the other parent can be very harmful to a child.  This is because when we are little, we form our identities and stable sense of self by associating with our caregivers and loved ones. 

When you speak badly about your ex, your child folds these words into their understanding of themselves, and this hurts your child, as well as your relationship with your child. Eventually the child’s identity becomes more independent and isn’t so entwined with their parents’.  As your child grows and matures, they will be increasingly aware of relationship dynamics and come to their own understanding of their parents’ behaviors. Providing them the room to develop their identity and stable sense of self without disparaging their other parent sets them up for resilience.  

Connected Kids are Healthy Kids

Unless safety is a concern, children benefit from strong relationships with both parents. It’s in the best interest of your child to support the other parent’s connection in their life as best as you can.  Of course it’s hard to do at times, but try to keep your anger, resentment, blame, jealousy, or hatred from impacting your child’s relationship with your ex.  In the aftermath of divorce or separation many people need help sorting through and coping with their strong emotions, and this is totally normal!  Reach out to friends or family to help you process the negative emotions and frustrations, or reach out to us for support.

Conclusion

When divorce is the best option for the family, it can be hard to forge your new family portrait. While this process is difficult, with time and support, families can find ways to grow stronger together, open the door to new beginnings, and create healthier family dynamics overall.

 

Depression Mental Wellness SAD By Beth Church 0 Comments

Beyond the Winter Blues: What is Seasonal Affective Disorder and How can we Fight It?

 

Written by Sarah Engels: MS, TLLP

The winter months can be tough. The colder weather and shorter days can make normal tasks feel extra difficult during this time. Many people feel like they are running on empty or they might have a hard time participating in the activities they normally enjoy. It could seem even harder to focus on work we need to get done. These all can be symptoms of  Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), a more intense version of the “Winter Blues,” that can impact our functioning this time of year.

Understanding Seasonal Affective Disorder

Seasonal Affective Disorder is a type of depression that is associated with the season, most commonly winter. It’s very biologically driven, associated with changes in our brains and bodies that occur during winter. Individuals with SAD often experience the onset of symptoms during the fall, as days get shorter and there is less sunlight. The shortening of days and lack of sunlight impact parts of the brain that affect our “sleep-wake cycle”, or circadian rhythm, and our mood. Researchers have even found that levels of melatonin, a hormone associated with our sleep patterns, are associated with SAD symptoms.

Seasonal Affective Disorder, just like other depressive disorders, manifests in a variety of ways, so individuals’ symptoms  may vary. Some of the symptoms of SAD include excessive tiredness, increased anxiety and feelings of guilt/hopelessness, decreased ability to focus, social withdrawal and loss of interest in activities you might normally enjoy. Depression is not just sadness that comes and goes, but rather, a shift in overall mood and functioning, which can even include feeling low to no emotion. And just like other forms of depression, SAD can occur on its own, or be triggered by other life events or stressors. .

5 Ways to Combat the Winter Blues

There are many things you can do on your own to help fight off the winter blues or SAD. It all starts by encouraging mental wellness and mindfulness during these tough times.

1. Keep Engaging in Activities You Normally Enjoy

When dealing with depressive symptoms, it can be very easy to avoid participating in our regular activities. To combat SAD, we have to go against our instincts to hibernate and continue to participate and engage in the activities that normally bring us joy. This allows us to counter social withdraw and isolation, and continue to push positive neurochemicals such as endorphins, oxytocin and dopamine.

2. Take Care of Your Physical Wellness

There is a direct link between physical and mental wellness. When our bodies feel good, it helps our minds feel good too. So as the season hits hard, it is important to address both. Some ways to address your physical wellness are eating healthy, well-balanced meals, decreasing use of alcohol and drugs (yes! Including caffeine!), exercising for at least twenty minutes each day, and getting enough sleep. Be sure to attend regular check ups with your primary care physician and follow their recommendations as well.

3. Take Advantage of the Sun When You Can

We feel happier and more focused when we are able to get consistent sunlight, as the sun impacts the parts of the brain that control our mood and circadian rhythm. It is especially helpful to get sun when you wake up in the morning, as this is a great way to jumpstart your body and your day. It can be as simple as a short walk outside in the morning that will leave you feeling more energized and ready for the day. If you see the sun peak out – try to spend time outside or by a bright window.  Physicians even prescribe special lights that mimic sunlight (without the skin damage) for SAD patients… ask your primary provider if you think this might benefit you.

4. Talk to Your Family and Friends: You Are Not Alone!

Depression and the winter blues can make us feel very isolated, and often we will isolate ourselves when we are feeling down. Connecting with friends and maintaining an active social life can decrease our risk for social isolation and encourage positive communication. Friends and family want to help us when we are feeling down, but they are not mind readers! By communicating how we are feeling with friends, we are able to receive the social support we need.

5. Seek Treatment As Needed

Don’t wait until things get bad to seek help. If you or a loved one are experiencing symptoms of seasonal affective disorder for a prolonged period of time, reach out to a professional for help. It is better to seek help before crises come up so that we are equipped with the tools to handle hard times before they happen.

Conclusion

Depression is not something we can ‘just snap out of.’ It takes time and effort, and eventually day by day, we begin to feel better. There is relief and there is hope. Reach out today if you or a loved one are experiencing symptoms of Seasonal Affective Disorder and would like to begin treatment.

Holidays Mental Wellness Self-improvement Uncategorized By Beth Church 0 Comments

Going Beyond Resolutions: Cultivating Change Through Gratitude

Written by: Jessi Beatty, PhD, LP

It’s that time of year when people are setting intentions and goals for the new year.  One important way to transition from the past year into the next is to consciously build or create more positive thoughts and actions. We often think of these as resolutions, but if we look deeper into what supports positive change, we can move beyond resolutions and into lasting positive change.

Rooted in Gratitude

Positive thoughts and actions are often rooted in our experience of gratitude. Research has shown the important benefits of gratitude to our overall mental health, motivation, and physical health.  While our minds naturally notice and focus on the negative to keep us safe and aware of our surroundings, this tendency can burden us with anxiety, depression and stop us from starting positive behaviors. However, with practice you can notice more of the good in your life. It doesn’t have to be a big undertaking to teach your mind to experience gratitude regularly. It’s more about short periods of consistency over time. When we notice what brings us a sense of gratitude, we tend to DO more that brings us that unique and wonderful feeling.

Set up short moments of gratitude practice each day

The first step is, of course, upping the frequency that we consciously attend to gratitude. Regularly building the habit of recognizing and appreciating the good things in your life, no matter how big or small, helps build happiness, self-esteem, and keeps you in the present moment. You don’t have to spend a long time focusing on gratitude to get its benefits. You could add it into your morning or bedtime routine or take a break during the workday to reflect. Possible ways include spending a few minutes listing three good things that happened today. It could be little things like someone holding the door for you, noticing how beautiful the sunrise is, getting a text from a friend or bigger things like finishing a project you’ve been working on for a long time.  You can make a conscious effort to notice when others are doing good things and tell them thank you. Each thank you builds something positive for you both. You can go on a walk and use your senses to notice the sights, smells, and feel of the sun or wind. Regular gratitude practice helps us connect with others, our surroundings and ourselves. 

Change how you ask your family about their day

Another way to help yourself and your loved ones focus more on gratitude involves how you ask about their day.  Rather than simply asking how their day was, try asking: What surprised you about your day? Who made you feel cared about today? Who did you help today? What made you laugh today? When did you feel calm, content or relaxed? 

Questions like this may lead to better conversations rather than getting the typical “fine” or “it was good” response. Questions like these can encourage us to share and reflect on the good, training us to scan for the positive in our days. It can help balance any negative things that happen, which are also important to talk about. It can be so easy to get into the pattern of venting or focusing on the bad with our loved ones. These questions challenge us to reframe the way we reflect on our day.

Change the questions you ask yourself

While building conversations around the good things that happen day to day with our loved ones, it’s also important to be aware of what we are training our own brains to focus on. Our words matter. Not just with others, but also with ourselves! Our internal dialog can easily get stuck in negative spirals or repeatedly place a distorted emphasis on what went wrong. When we focus solely on what might or did go wrong, we aren’t focused on what we did do, or could do right. To break a negative thinking cycle, try asking yourself: What did I learn in the situation? What would I do differently if I had it to do all over again? Focusing on gratitude often helps us set an effective pathway forward for what we actually want, rather than just highlighting what didn’t work or what we’d like to avoid. If anxiety about what’s to come creeps in and you start thinking of all that can go wrong, ask yourself: What if it goes right? What is the more likely scenario? Will this matter in a week? In a month? In a year? You can use visualization to set a positive mindset for upcoming tasks and set yourself up for things to go well, rather than getting trapped in what could go wrong and worst case scenarios. 

Conclusion

Making the intention to cultivate gratitude as a daily practice, in your life and your loved one’s lives, helps kick start the new year in a positive direction.  Things will not always go the way you would like and situations are often out of our control, but building the practice of noticing what is going right helps motivate positive and effective changes, and give important boosts to your mood. Regular practice helps to reset our mindset, pulling us out of the negative spirals, and keeps us moving in a positive direction. Gratitude helps us feel connected and motivated!  

Wishing you and your loved ones a happy and healthy 2025!

Contact us if you have a goal for 2025 that you would like help working towards!

Child Wellness Children Therapy Mental Wellness Parenting Teenage Uncategorized By Beth Church 0 Comments

Mental Health Influencers: Understanding & Managing the Impact of Social Media & Gaming on Youth Development

Written by: Julie Braciszewski, PhD, LP

Do you have a tech zombie at your house? Do you walk into a room only to find a loved one bathed in the blue light of a screen, with glazed over eyes and a blank expression? Or maybe you have a tech gremlin. They appear calm and relaxed on screens but then become irritable or even intensely angry when it’s time to get off screens? Or perhaps you have a Youtube-ing, tech-toc-teen  who appears to partake in social media light-heartedly but shows concerning signs of being influenced in negative ways. Chances are, your child is engaging in gaming or social media use, and you are wondering how this is influencing their mental health?   

Screens & Executive Functioning

You’re not crazy… increased time on screens is associated with worse executive functioning. Executive functioning describes the brain processes that help guide goal driven behavior and self-regulation. So if your child seems to have more difficulty completing less-fun tasks such as picking up after themselves, getting ready to leave the house, or even homework, it might be because screen use has gotten out of balance. You might be yelling ‘OMG just get it done!’ in your household lately, you might want to re-examine the amount of tech use and its timing in your household. This balance is especially hard to attain when kids are on screens all day at school.  

Rewards to Real Life

Most apps, games and social media are designed to manipulate the reward centers of our brain. When we get something we want, achieve a goal, or experience pleasure, positive neuro-chemicals and activity lights up our brain’s reward center. You can even see it on brain scans!  When using apps, games and social media we get lots of little and big reward ‘pings’ in our brain without actually having to exert much effort. So when we re-enter the real world and need to do tasks that require sustained effort and result in more subtle or even long-term rewards, we may react with irritation, frustration, and even feelings of helplessness. Some kids and teens will even react with intense anger when it’s time to put down screens and re-enter the real world.  

Identity Building from Social Media

Identity building in the era of apps, gaming and social media is tricky! Content is pushed via algorithms and is based not only on our patterns of viewing and consumption, but also our identifying factors such as age and gender. Our feeds tend to be narrowly based and can become dangerous echo chambers, leading to reduced exposure to people, ideas and information. Research clearly tells us that  this information greatly impacts our thinking patterns, such as what we think of ourselves and others.

The Social Media Sads

Social Media has a complex relationship with mental health. It can provide a sense of connection and positive inclusion in groups, but it can also fuel fear of missing out, ‘should’ thinking, and intensely unrealistic expectations for everything from looks to socializing and material belongings. 

I Am The Influencer Now

We know social media and gaming will continue to have a huge influence on our thinking, behavioral, emotional and social patterns. But if we are aware of these impacts, we can be conscious of having our own positive influence over learning to regulate screen use in our own family and household. 

Here are some tips to consciously engage in screen time and social media use in your household: 

  1. Model good tech use boundaries: Establish tech free zone in the house (e.g., dinner table? Bathroom? Bedrooms?), and tech check-in times (bed time? Study time?) 
  2. Establishing the timing of when tech is allowed in your household is paramount to kids developing self-regulation skills around tech use.  Fostering the mindset that necessary tasks get done before tech time helps hone expectations and self-regulation. 
  3. Step away from screens. Establish a norm of setting phones/iPads down and turning screens off when engaging in work, chores, eating, etc.  Create physical distance between screens and other essential activities.
  4. Build Self-worth and Identity through real-world competencies: Learning tik-tok dances is fun and makes us feel cool with our friends, but witnessing real-world impact increases positive self-worth and identity much, much more 
  5. Shared Values: Take time to sit with your child and teen and consume social media or games together. Your input and perspective does influence their inner narrative

If you feel your child or teen is demonstrating concerning signs of too much screen use or social media consumption, contact us and speak with one of our specialists.

 

Eating Disorders Holidays Mental Wellness By Beth Church 0 Comments

Tips for Navigating Holiday Eating

Written by: Bismah Khan, MA, LLP

Thanksgiving and the holiday season are fast approaching which can be a difficult time for those who are struggling with their relationship with food and/or body image. Thankfully, there are many tips and skills that can be utilized to make holidays a more joyful time! Planning ahead of time allows you to enjoy the holiday to the fullest. 

Tip One: Identify Your Supports 

Creating a support plan will help you feel more confident and in control going into the holiday season, especially for holidays with a food focus.. Identify a trusted and reliable support person who you can text or call if eating disorder thoughts become overwhelming. Be sure to choose someone who understands your eating disorder journey and is willing and available to provide support. 

Tip Two: Pack A Coping Kit

Which coping skills are you planning to use, and what physical items might help you move through difficult emotions and thoughts? Throw them in your bag or dedicate a small container to these items. For example, it might be helpful to bring a phone charger to ensure your supports are always available! Perhaps pack a strong, pleasant lotion for grounding exercises. The possibilities are endless and the physicality of an actual item can really help shift our thoughts and emotions. 

Tip Two: Talk It Out with a Professional! 

Luckily, our holiday meals often consist of the same or similar foods each year and this makes it easy to plan for. There is some sense of predictability surrounding family traditions which can be helpful. Prior to the holiday, schedule an appointment with your dietician to discuss what you might eat the day of the occasion. If your support person can be present for this appointment, consider having them be coached on how to plate your meal for you. This will help you to reduce your eating disorder thoughts in relation to portion sizes and comparisons of “healthy” and “unhealthy” foods present. Scheduling an appointment with your psychotherapist is equally as useful. During this appointment, you both can work on identifying coping skills you can utilize during the gathering and brainstorm ways to reduce overall anxiety related to eating. Prior to the holiday, it might also be helpful to continue working towards any established food goals that are part of the existing treatment plan.

Tip Three: Create Traditions Beyond the Food 

Food is usually the focus of many holidays because of the traditions it carries from year to year and for some, the symbolism of certain foods. Try to create and establish traditions that have less of an emphasis on food. For example, plan to have a game night after dinner or a walk around the neighborhood. Think of what brings you the most joy and establish a new tradition out of it! 

Tip Four: Advocating For Your Needs

Let  loved ones know ahead of time that you do not want to discuss your weight, body, or food choices at this gathering. There is nothing wrong with advocating for yourself, especially in eating disorder recovery. In fact, it is encouraged! Unfortunately, not everyone honors these boundaries, or they make a hurtful comment out of habit. Find ways to politely excuse yourself and disengage from such conversations and reach out to your support person right away. It can also be helpful to write down some thoughts and feelings you had in reaction to these comments and discuss them with your psychotherapist at your next appointment. Your psychotherapist can help brainstorm ways to navigate these difficult situations so you go into them feeling prepared.

 

Lastly, celebrate the small wins. Did you attend the holiday gathering despite your anxiety and fears? Way to go! Did you set boundaries with loved ones, even if they did not honor them? Amazing! Did you try a new food? Wow! The small steps are what get us to the finish line in eating disorder recovery. I hope this holiday season is filled with many small wins for you!

If you feel you or a loved one may benefit from additional support, please do not hesitate to contact us and speak with one of our expert clinicians.

ADHD Child Wellness Parenting By Beth Church 0 Comments

ADHD Strengths That Might be Driving you Crazy as a Parent

Written by: Julie Braciszewski, PhD, LP

ADHD is a neurodevelopmental difference – meaning, ADHD brains are developing differently. (Click here for a more in-depth explanation of these brain development differences). And these differences result in behavioral and emotional patterns that can be important and unique strengths for individuals with ADHD.  However, these strengths can also cause disruption in the household and sometimes look like oppositional or disrespectful behavior. But as we understand these strengths better, we can develop conscious parenting strategies to support these patterns, help our ADHD kids thrive, and have a calm household.

Problem Solving Styles 

Your child’s way of solving problems might not match up with yours. One of the most notable strengths of kids, teens and adults with ADHD is their valuable strength in problem solving. They are often attending to different information or seeing the problem through a different lens, and thus go about solving problems in unique ways. This is one of the reasons you often see individuals with ADHD are so successful in less traditional career and work choices. However, in your household, when problems arise, the approach your child takes might make no sense to you and even cause you major frustration. In fact, you might feel like they aren’t listening to you or don’t want to solve the problem, when their brain can’t make sense of what seems to logical and linear to you. Taking a moment to help them verbalize what they actually identify as the problem (it might be different from what you identify!), what they see is contributing to the problem, and how they would like to solve it, is a collaborative cascade that helps support and hone this unique strength.   

Your Child Might Literally Perceive Time Differently! 

We all know that the experience of time is relative, but did you know this effect is amplified for your ADHD kid or teen? Isn’t this incredible!  This is such an asset when they find something they are super interested in, as they can spend a ton of time digging in and digging deep. But it also means that for difficult or undesirable tasks, time inches by at a painful and glacial pace. In your household this might mean these uninteresting or undesirable tasks are met with intense emotions, difficult behaviors or total disengagement. Starting with acknowledging this phenomena with empathy goes a long way to help get through challenging tasks. “Oh man, I know these 30 minutes of homework feel like 5 hours to you, that’s so hard.” Then, working to clearly and concretely delineate the time interval, for instance, by using visual timers, helps to reduce the frustration. 

Risk-taking Tolerance 

Did you know that kids with ADHD don’t process punishment or negative outcomes the same as their neurotypical peers? Individuals with ADHD are more likely to see negative outcomes as unrelated to their choices or actions, resulting in a tenacity and tolerance for risk-taking. While this might mean your kiddo is destined for big things, as a parent it may also drive you mad. In your household, that may mean that when you try to ‘teach your child a lesson’ through punishment, they don’t connect their choice or actions with the negative outcome, leading them to repeat the offense again and again. You might feel like they are ignoring you – but it’s actually because their brain is processing the outcome or punishment differently. ADHD brains are great at paying attention to and remembering the positive pay off, or reward. Admittedly, it takes a lot of practice and self-regulation on our part as parents, but turning to the positive replacement behaviors and rewarding these helps grow that choice-outcome connection much more effectively than punishment.

Emotional Intensity

For many individuals with ADHD, the difference in wiring (connectivity within the brain) and communication (neurotransmitters) in their brain also results in intense emotional experiences. This might be one reason individuals with ADHD tend to be very passionate and creative.  And as any parent of an ADHD kiddo or teen will tell you, helping their child learn to regulate, effectively express and use these intense emotions takes a lot of skill and perseverance. ADHD kids often need extra support to learn how to label their emotions, regulate and tolerate challenging emotions, and eventually use these intense emotional experiences to fuel creativity, productivity and deep, meaningful relationships.

If you would like help developing a plan to support your child or loved one’s strengths, please reach out!

 

ADHD Mental Wellness Parenting Testing By Beth Church 0 Comments

What Your Loved One with ADHD Wants You to Know

Written by: Jill Wasserman, MA, LPC

As a parent or partner to a loved one with ADHD, it can be difficult to fully understand the experience of navigating this world with ADHD. So we asked! We asked clinicians and clients with ADHD, what do they wish their loved ones knew?   

Before we tell you what they said, though, let’s chat about what ADHD actually is. ADHD is a neurodevelopmental disorder, meaning that there are real differences in the way ADHD brains communicate and store information. These brain development differences cause challenges with a group of behaviors commonly referred to as, ‘executive functions.’  The term, executive functioning, refers to self-regulatory behaviors such as attention, concentration, and focus, as well as task planning and initiation, transitioning from one task to the next, flexible problem solving, emotion regulation, impulse control, self-monitoring and organization. So in summary, ADHD is not simply a problem with focus and attention, it is a brain development difference that causes self-regulation challenges. As one of our clients said, “ADHD is so much more than ‘inability to focus’!”

So what did our ADHD clients say?

Here are a few things your loved on with ADHD wants you to know:

  1. I’m trying my best: Even when it seems like I’m not paying attention, not focused, fidgeting, restless, or not following instructions, I want you to know that I am really trying hard. My brain works differently. Please don’t think I’m lazy. I actually am working twice as hard, if not more, than my peers.
  2. There are unique and positive aspects to having ADHD:  I seem to do well in situations that require me to “think outside of the box”. I feel some of my greatest strengths are my creativity and innovative ideas. I think I see and experience the world a little differently than others and that’s ok. It actually really great sometimes. In addition, I find I can hyperfocus on things I really enjoy and feel passionate about, leading to high levels of productivity and mastery. Because I have had to overcome my own unique challenges, I have developed strong problem solving skills and resilience. I feel I am very determined to succeed.
  3. It can be hard for me to recognize when I am hungry, tired, and other physical cues: My brain is so busy with thoughts, swirling with information, and a flurry of activity that it can be difficult for me to pay attention to some of my most basic needs. I may even blow way past the point of hunger or being tired and become very dysregulated as a result.
  4. I need to take breaks: Long periods of work (and even short periods) can be draining. Taking short breaks can help me recharge. I need to move my body on breaks, my brain literally needs more blood flow. Sometimes I have no idea that I actually need a break and it’s helpful when you give me ‘permission’ to take a break.
  5. Structure and routine helps me: I may say that I feel “boxed in” but having a consistent schedule and routine helps me manage my tasks, time, and responsibilities better.
  6. Positive reinforcement: I know it’s frustrating when I don’t follow directions, don’t complete something, lose something… I am frustrated too. Please try to notice when I do something well or I am trying. This will work better for me when you are trying to praise or encourage my efforts.
  7. Please don’t forget…I have strengths! Please be aware and help me recognize my strengths. Supporting and nurturing these can do wonders for boosting my self-esteem and confidence. I can feel pretty down about the things I struggle with.
  8. I need help and support with organization: My brain categorizes information differently so keeping my space clean and organization strategies are not my strong suit. I need support with this. I also have a hard time keeping track of things and lose things easily. Please don’t be mad! I just need a better system. I like to keep things out and in view because if it is out of sight, it is out of mind. I can have trouble with something called object permanence so if it is put away, I might completely forget about it!
  9. Emotional support: I have a hard time regulating my emotions and often get very frustrated and upset. I tend to feel emotions intensely and don’t know what to do to cope sometimes. I can sometimes feel like I am on an emotional rollercoaster and it is very challenging for me to regulate. Your understanding and support is helpful. Having ways to manage and move through these big feelings is even more helpful.
  10. My “out of control” feelings are just as hard and uncomfortable for me to experience as they are for you to witness: When you’re calm it helps me to be calm. You model and show me adaptive and healthy ways to regulate. It’s almost like I borrow some of your “calm” when I can’t quite find mine.
  11. Clear concise instructions, please: Too much information can overload and overwhelm me. Please provide little bits at a time as clearly and concisely as possible. If I didn’t follow through with something, it’s because I was at capacity.
  12. I’m not being difficult on purpose! My behavior is not who I am. It is a direct result of the challenges I experience and how my brain processes information and input.
  13. Patience is key: With the proper supports and patience, I know I can achieve my goals. But please be patient with me. My progress and changes won’t happen overnight.
  14. Your words matter: If you ask me a lot of questions it can sometimes feel overwhelming and threatening to me to the point that I shut down. I prefer you also include statements and declarative language to help me not feel so on alert.

Conclusion

Even though the ADHD brain presents challenges, strengths in ADHD creativity, connection and problem solving ensure that each individual with ADHD can feel positive. As we help our loved ones navigate their challenges and provide them with the proper tools and supports it can be helpful to be mindful of their experiences and remind them of their strengths. By celebrating their unique abilities, perspectives, and by fostering a supportive environment, we empower them to thrive and reach their full potential!

If you feel you or your child could benefit from additional support for ADHD, please call us and speak with one of our highly trained specialists. Also, ask about our neuropsychological testing services!

Read more about ADHD by visiting the following links:

Blog- How Do We Know ADHD is a Real Disorder
https://www.mbh-mi.com/how-do-we-know-adhd-is-a-real-disorder/

Blog- Understanding the Relationship Between ADHD and Sensory Seeking Behaviors
https://www.mbh-mi.com/relationship-between-adhd-and-sensory-seeking-behaviors/

Other ADHD blog posts
https://www.mbh-mi.com/category/adhd/

ADHD Resource Guide
https://www.mbh-mi.com/adhd-rg/

 

ADHD Testing:

For more information about ADHD testing
https://www.mbh-mi.com/testing/adhd/

For more general information about testing
https://www.mbh-mi.com/testing/general-information/

 

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